Posts tagged breasties

We are rolling in the aisles here at Fwithpeople.com HQ because some concrete numbers have come in.  These figures cannot be disputed, so don’t bother trying.  Here they are:  161, 109, 77, 53, 48 and 24.  What do those number represent?  Nope, wrong, they aren’t Sparky Andersons daily weigh-ins.  They do represent, in chronological order of release, the overall view counts our Project F videos.  That sigh you just let out sums up our morning.  Let’s turn this shit around and F with someone in Montana.  Their ad and emails are in black, Dougie Monroe types it up in blue.  May the F be with you ™

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Ping Pong table, gently used – $250

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From Doug:

From Diane (monb******@aol.com)

Oh, okay, yeah, let me just settle in here for a bit to take this interview.

 

1.  The table is 1 year(s) old, like new and gently used.

 

2.  I bought it online from Robbins table tennis (robbinstabletennis.com.)  It was $699.95 new.  It’s international tournament quality, so I guess that means you can take it overseas with you if you want to compete.

 

3.  It folds up vertically, and it has wheels which makes for easy storage.  It also folds up horizontally if the table is upside down.

 

4.  I’ll include a picture (attached as dougspingy.jpg), but you can also see it at robbinstabletennis.com.

 

5.  Yes, it will require two people to get it out of the house and into a truck or trailer.  If you are interested and show up alone, my wife Debbie will help you carry it out.  She can get really amped when it comes to moving things, especially if she’s got her monthly demon.

 

Well, it’s a good deal, more than 50% off on a great table.

Let me know,

Doug “Topspin” Monroe

 

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From Doug (the next day):

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Hello, your email bounced.  Everything okay?

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From Diane monb******@aol.com:

 

Yes, I don’t know why it would have been sent back.

 

That’s a really nice table!  Where do you live?

 

I’m able to come out tonight to see it, but it may be too large for getting up the stairs into the rec room.  Does it disassemble to make it easier?

 

Call me at 539-**** if you can.  I’m going offline for awhile.

 

Diane

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From Doug:

 

Well, a lot of times when email is sent back, it usually means that the email address belongs to a spammer or someone that is trying to scam money via electronic transfer for goods that most likely don’t exist.  I’ve sent a quick copy of our conversation along with your phone number to AOL, and they said they would keep a very close eye on your account activity, monitoring email behavior patterns, detecting potential spam-like material, etc.

 

But that table is really nice, isn’t it?  I really don’t want to see it go, but we have no choice but to sell.  The most important thing for me at this point is to make sure it’s going to a nice home.  Sorry I missed your email last night, Debbie doesn’t like when I’m on the computer after 5pm, because she thinks it’s bad for my eyes, wrists, forearms, neckbone, posture, circulation, arthritis, and brain.

 

The table can be disassembled to make it easier for you to move up a flight of stairs.  Can you send a picture of your hallway and staircase and I’ll let you know what I think?   

Thanks,

Topspin

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From Diane (monb******@aol.com):

This project is on hold for the time being.  I am waiting to hear back from a guy who has a table for $125, but he’s not sure where it is right now!

 

I live between Belgrade and Manhattan.  Did you say you are in Bozeman?

 

Diane

 

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From Doug:

I’m sorry.  I’m sorry, what?  Can you repeat that?  What does it mean when you say the project is on hold?  You are waiting to hear back from a guy who has a table for $125, but he’s not sure where it is.  Hmm…Sounds like a wonderful prospect.  Let me ask you this.  You’ve lost your glasses before, or, maybe a set of keys, but when’s the last time you lost a table?  So now your project is on hold, which puts my project on hold, while we simultaneously wait for an idiot to locate a table.  Where does he even get off contacting you about a table if he doesn’t know where it is?  What did his email say (can you forward it to me?)  I am really flummoxed.  Let me get this straight.  He emailed you and said something to the effect of “I have a ping pong table you might be interested in.  I’m asking $125.  Before I can sell it to you, I just have to find it.” I hope he never finds it and then you and I can continue on with our original project, the one where you have the money and the one where I have the table right here, and not the one where we both are waiting on a moron.  I’m sorry if I seem a little bit tense, I’ve been having trouble going.

 

If you’d like, we can get that other guy on a conference call to see where things stand.  I contacted you first, buy my table TODAY.

Thanks,

Topspin

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(no reply)

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